So the world cup is over and Spain has become the new champion but you already know this unless you have been living under a rock this past month although I think that is not even a suitable excuse. Anyways, today’s post has nothing to do with who won the game or who knows who won the game. It has everything to do with that octopus named Paul. I have just received breaking news from the Octopus kingdom(Octopussy). I would let my loyal friend Mark the octopus take over from here. Over to you Mark.
Screen behind me shows an octopus.
*clears throat* *taps mic* ok its working. *clears throat again*
Hello everybody. I am Mark reporting on behalf of my brethren from our cave in Octopussy. I am here to inform y’all that a bounty has been placed on Paul’s head. If you see him anywhere, please get rid of him. I assure you the reward will be worth your while. You see, this my friend Paul has endangered my whole species. Now you humans think we can tell the future. Do you realise how catastrophic that is for us?? Some of the spies we sent out to investigate have returned with terrible news. We are now of more value than the other animals. We are now being hunted for different purposes which would never work like exams cheating portions and drinks that can help you tell the future.
As I speak to you now, my clan is preparing to move house. We are no longer safe in our current location. Our children will not grow up to see all the historical monuments and building we have and we couldn’t keep records seeing as we live in water and all form of documentation would be ruined. Now they shall grow up and only hear stories and descriptions all because Paul could not keep his guesses to himself. I assure you his predictions were just lucky guesses. You see, back home he was called Goodluck by his parents. His name was changed to Paul by the people that adopted him after he wandered off from the clan one stormy day. If not for CNN we would never have found him. Yes we receive CNN here so you can close your mouth now. His grandmother even had a mild heart attack caused by the shock in learning her grandson was still alive.
I don’t have much time now ’cause the storm is coming and soon this signal shall be *static sound* lost but *static sound* please if you can *static sound* help us te…*signal is lost*
o well…that was Mark. I apologise for the bad connection but as we speak, the bounty money is being wired to my account. You know where to find me when you have Paul’s carcass :).